healing for your masc + fem

In order to assist you in deepening your embodiment here are different invitations depending what energy and need you identify with most, scroll to the one that resonates with you!

[ but first some definitions - feminine energy: intuition, healing, spontaneous, love, surrender, flow, receiving, being, creativity, chaos, sexuality, expression, the unconscious, nurturing, rest, vulnerability, unknown, desires, mess, experience, emotions

masculine energy: giving, space holding, the conscious, integrity, leader, ritual, strength, discipline, providing, action, protection, structure, security, logic, direction, focus, stability, linear, strength, grounded, reason ]

My hope is that the following are invitations that you can weave into your everyday life that make an uplifting impact on how you feel and enhance your connection to self.

Feminine beings wanting to heal their feminine energy:

1. practice adornment

The practice of adornment is ancient and sacred. mindfully choosing what you will wear and how you will adorn yourself is a beautiful intentional practice. After choosing what is right for your day and preparing your body in a way that feels right for you, dress yourself with a huge amount of love, care and presence. Showing up for yourself in this way is for sure to connect you with the goddess.

2. soften your body

Relax your body but make it a practice and get super curious. Throughout your day, many times a day (seriously, more the better) take a moment to relax your body.  Your shoulders, hips, jaw, belly, legs, etc. Relax it all.  This will give you more access to rest, to be able to receive, to feel your emotions and to evoke healing, all part of that juicy feminine energy.  I promise you don't need to hold onto the tension in your shoulders when you are typing away at work. 

3. receive, receive, receive: 

The compliments, the help in big and small ways, the opportunity for healing. Begin to open up to it all.  Okay this one is a bigger ask and isn’t as simple as the first two.  So if this is a new concept to you: start by being aware of where it is hard for you to receive. Once/if you are aware of that, lean into it, challenge yourself to approach and receive what you have been resisting. Say thank you to the compliments, ask for the help you need, say yes to the opportunity, whatever it is you need to do, lean in. You are worthy of it!

Feminine being wanting to heal their masculine energy

1. get clear on values and align with actions

This takes a little work, but you wouldn't find yourself reading this section if you didn’t enjoy a little work right? Are you clear on your values? And I don't mean clear on the set of values you were conditioned to honor, but the values that matter to your heart and soul? Are you clear on those? If/when you get clear on those take some time to go over your daily actions and where you spend your most time, energy and attention. Do these repeated daily actions line up with the values that matter to you or the ones you were conditioned to believe? What can you shift in your day to day so that you can start embodying your true values on a regular basis?

2. practice self care rituals

Yes, your bubble baths and spa dates are important.  But the self care I'm speaking to here is the boring, mundane kind. The daily skin care, the budget tracking, the morning and night time routines, the home cooked meals, the gym sessions.  Making self care a staple in your day and week is a great way to heal your masculine and redirect him to loving up on your feminine.  what do you need to feel loved, cared for and nurtured? it’s time to tend to that love, and not just once, but as daily, weekly and monthly rituals that you come back to again and again.

3. invite in intuition

Your intellect is beautiful and you owe it a lot of gratitude.  You wouldn't be where you are today without that magnificent mind of yours. But the invitation here is to allow the rationale, reason and logic of the thinking mind to loosens its grips a little bit.  I am not saying throw all caution to the wind, I am saying start to open up to your intuition.  We each have an internal guidance system that is giving us real feedback and wisdom, if we could only start to trust it to start to see how powerful it really is.  So that’s the assignment.  How can you make space, within the logic, for the intuitive sensations that are valuable and worthy of consideration.  That gut feeling, the random emotion that creeps in, that uneasiness about someone or someplace; why not give these real things opportunity to speak to you and be heard.

Masculine beings wanting to heal their feminine energy 

Evolve your relationship with your emotions

One of the most important qualities about a healthy masculine partner is their ability to hold loving space for their feminine counterpart, including and especially her wild and dark parts. I believe that in order to do that effectively, one most first be able to do that for oneself.  If you are sad or angry or lonely, are you able to hold yourself in these emotions without trying to numb yourself or distract yourself? 

If you were conditioned as a man, this is one of the hardest tasks when it comes to the healing journey. The program of “boys don't cry” and this macho idea of “being a man” runs deep.  One of the most noble things a masculine being can do is reclaim his relationship with emotions, accept them, allow them, be seen and heard in them and develop and new and healthy relationship to them.

Tap into creativity

So you don’t have to attempt to do arts and crafts but if that resonates, definitely go for it.  Creativity can be woven into so much and doesn't have to be approached in a “making art” way if you really don’t love the idea of that.  If you do, but think you aren’t a great artist, there are tons of options like paint by numbers or tutorials or even things like Lego building kits that you can take on as a creative project.

But creativity is an energy that you can embody at many points during your day.  If you love to cook, can you weave in creativity there? What about when you are getting dressed for a night out or spending an afternoon rearranging your space and maybe even redecorating.    

Consciously rest and self pleasure

Emphasis on consciously here.  Resting and self pleasure are big parts of your feminine energy but most are reaching for coping mechanisms and numbing agents when it comes to these activities.  Alcohol or cannabis or another substance along with screens is a deadly combination to cut you off from her.

Try resting and self pleasure without the use of substances or screens.  For rest, can you go for a walk in nature, read a good book or invite a friend over for coffee and chats. For self pleasure, can you focus on the sensations in your body and your breathing, closing your eyes and using this potent and sacred time almost as a meditation.  Try it.

Masculine wanting to heal his masculine energy

Take stock of your integrity

People like to say that integrity is doing the right thing when nobody's watching and I disagree.  Because what’s the right thing to do? Right according to who? I believe what describes integrity better is ‘doing what you say and saying what you do.”

Speaking out loud to those it impacts, what it is you intend on doing followed by the action of doing said thing, that’s integrity, able to be aligned with you because you speak it an claim it.  So this invitation is about taking stock of your integrity, are you saying what you are going to do and following through with that? It can be little tasks to big promises, it can be between you and someone else and also between you and yourself.   

Bring your presence

Presence and your ability to keep your presence is like your masculine sharpening his sword.  With presence, it is more than just being present, it is about having your focus and attention directed outwardly into your environment and whoever/whatever is there.  The biggest challenge here can be getting out of the head and all the loud thoughts that can show up while you build your capacity for presence. If you are in the space but lost in your mental gymnastics or dissociated completely, it can be felt by those close to you.

This is definitely like practicing an open eye meditation where the focus is on whatever is going on in the space.  I, personally, think presence is the sexiest quality in a masculine, and when someone brings a honed presence I feel a deep sense of safety in my body and being. 

Hone your discipline

Lastly, continue to sharpen that sword of discipline in multiple ways.  Bringing your presence like we just spoke about is one way to practice discipline but I invite you to introduce multiple ways to get to know discipline on a deeper level.  Get clear on your rituals, especially your morning and night time rituals (they don’t have to be anything elaborate!). Challenge yourself for a period of time (no streaming or smoking for X days). Follow through with what your say you are going to do, while giving yourself grace and not treating yourself like a robot.

Discipline is important for the masculine as it incorporates so many other masculine qualities like presence, integrity, foundation, structure, strength and focus.

I hope that helps you gain some direction for your healing if you need it.  

Now it is super easy to find medicine for yourself in all categories, if you took time to read them all. 

I encourage you to stick to 1-3 things that resonate with you the most.  If they happen to be in separate categories, so be it!

You get to discern what is best for you, there really is no right or wrong.

If you need spaces to bring your intentions, energetic blocks and/or need for emotional release to, I got them for you:

Low budget space: resources

investment: $0-11

Medium budget space: private energy healing

investment: $149- $333

High budget space: sacred ceremony or bliss retreat or private retreat.

investment: $444- $1333

Send me a message if you have any general questions!